She's-a not Bad, I Break-a you Face Print E-mail
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Written by Christophor "SuperGuido" Rick   
Thursday, 31 January 2008

[News] [PS3] [Wii] [X360]

No slight meant to any Italians out there, the title is actually lyrics from an old song. A song that it seems EA means to bring to gaming. Well not literally but they did just announce FaceBreaker is in development for the PS3, Xbox 360 and Wii. What is FaceBreaker? What's-a matta you? I can't help but think of Joey from Friends and his terrible Italian accent...just to read about the game already before I have my cousin Nunzio rearrange your face for you.

“FaceBreaker reinvigorates one of the great genres in sports videogames. In no time at all, you’ll be picking up the controllers and knocking your opponent around the ring, smashing faces, and having a riot.”

--Peter Moore, president, EA SPORTS

Created by the same team that developed the award-winning Fight Night Round 3, FaceBreaker offers irreverent fun, immersive gameplay and eye-popping stylized graphics. In this in-your-face, arcade world full of ego-wielding characters, each boxer comes to life with unique attributes and distinct personal style, including Romeo, a Latin lover known for his pelvic thrusts, and Molotov, an oversized Russian demolitions expert with a penchant for fighting dirty. Add a little personal motivation to your fight by uploading a photo of your face to create a realistic likeness using Photo Game Face, and go toe-to-toe with a real-life friend or foe.

Somehow I envision pictures of kittens, Gabe's genitalia and other random things like ex-girlfriends getting involved in this game now.

Laugh out loud as you pummel your opponent with a barrage of blows to the face and watch in satisfaction as your progress is illustrated by real-time facial deformation. With haymakers, face shots and body blows, wait for the right moment to drop a super punch to make your presence known. Taunt your adversaries and flaunt your talent, by tying one hand behind your back to add ultimate humiliation to your bout. In FaceBreaker, it just feels good to rearrange your opponent's face.

I can already see Jack Thompson salivating over this title. I'm sure EA is big enough to take it on the chin when Jack brings 'The Lawmaker' down on them and tries to get this game banned from store shelves. I predict a third round knockout by EA on Jack 'I am God's Hammer' Thompson. Hey Jack, what's-a matta you? It's-a not so bad. Everyone needs a good face breaking on occasion, just so long as we leave it in the video game world and not out on the streets.

Remember kids, Uncle Jack says you too can be a big name lawyer, just by playing Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law, because video games teach you real life skills.

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